Rethinking New Year’s Resolutions

Sustainable Change with Somatic Therapy in San Diego

As we step into the New Year, many of us find ourselves reflecting on ways to improve our lives.

It’s a time for resolutions, big dreams, and ambitious goals.

Yet, despite our best intentions, many New Year’s resolutions fall by the wayside.

Why?

I’m here to share with you the secret to sustainable change with somatic therapy in San Diego.

 

The traditional approach to change often focuses on modifying behaviors without addressing the deeper programming that drives those actions.

What if, instead of pushing against old habits, we could rewrite the internal beliefs and patterns that hold us back?

As a San Diego trauma therapist specializing in somatic therapy and other transformative modalities,

I’ve seen how uncovering and rewriting these subconscious patterns creates lasting, sustainable change.

 

 

Let’s explore how this deeper approach can make your New Year’s goals more achievable than ever.

The Limitations of Traditional New Year’s Resolutions

Most New Year’s resolutions focus on external goals:

– Lose weight.
– Exercise more.
– Save money.
– Improve relationships.

 

While these are all worthy pursuits, they rarely address the root causes of our behaviors.

When we try to force change without understanding the underlying programming, it often feels like an uphill battle.

For example, someone might resolve to save money but struggle with deep-seated beliefs about their worthiness or their ability to achieve financial stability.

Without addressing these beliefs, lasting change remains elusive, because they spend money to feel better or give up on saving if they make one slip.

The Role of Programming in Behavior

Our programming consists of the subconscious beliefs and emotional patterns we’ve absorbed over time, often rooted in early life experiences.

This programming shapes how we see ourselves and the world, influencing everything from our relationships to our career choices.

 

Common Limiting Beliefs:

I’m not good enough.

I don’t deserve success.

It’s safer to stay small.

 

These beliefs act like invisible scripts, silently dictating our choices and actions.

 

Reflective Exercise:
Take a moment to consider a change you’ve wanted to make. Then ask yourself:

Are negative beliefs holding me back?
What programming drives my current behavior?

 

What Do You Deserve in the New Year?

As you reflect on your goals, ask yourself a powerful question:

*What do I truly believe I deserve?*

 

For some, this might involve personal growth—finding joy, peace, or self-love.

For others, it could center on professional aspirations, such as pursuing a dream career or building financial security.

 

Allow yourself to dream boldly. Imagine your ideal life. What does it look like? How does it feel?

Once you’ve envisioned what you want, ask the next critical question:

 

*Why haven’t I reached for the thing I want to deserve?*

The answer often lies in your programming.

 

How Trauma and Stress Shape Our Programming

Trauma and chronic stress have a profound impact on our programming.

They can leave us feeling stuck, anxious, or unworthy of pursuing our dreams.

As a trauma therapist specializing in modalities like Somatic Experiencing, EMDR, IFS (Internal Family Systems), brainspotting, Compassionate Inquiry and neurofeedback.  

I help clients uncover and heal these deep-seated patterns.

 

Understanding These Modalities:

– Somatic Therapy: Helps clients reconnect with their bodies to release trauma stored in physical sensations.
– EMDR Therapy in San Diego: Effective for processing traumatic memories and reducing their emotional intensity.
– Brainspotting Therapy: A cutting-edge approach that accesses the brain’s deep-seated emotional and physical responses to trauma.
– Internal Family Systems (IFS): Explores and harmonizes the “parts” of your psyche, such as the inner critic or wounded child.
– Neurofeedback: Uses real-time brain activity monitoring to help regulate the nervous system and promote emotional stability.

These approaches don’t just address surface-level behaviors—they target the root causes of emotional pain and help clients rewrite their programming.

My Personal Journey: From Anxiety to Empowerment

I know how challenging it can be to rewrite programming because I’ve lived it.

There was a time when I didn’t know how to love myself—or even like myself.

I struggled with constant anxiety, which eventually manifested in my body as Lupus.

My turning point came when I discovered the work of Dr. Gabor Maté.

His insights into trauma and healing resonated deeply with me, and I began to see how my early life experiences had shaped my beliefs and behaviors.

 

I enrolled in the professional training program for Compassionate Inquiry, and my teacher was Sat Dharam Kaur who co-developed the program.

Over two years, I became certified in this powerful approach, and it completely transformed my life.

 

The Impact of Compassionate Inquiry

– I uncovered the roots of my anxiety and self-doubt.
– I began to heal my inner child and rewrite limiting beliefs.
– My behaviors naturally shifted as I addressed the programming beneath them.

This journey showed me that sustainable change doesn’t come from forcing new habits—it comes from transforming the underlying programming.

Why Rewriting Programming Creates Sustainable Change

Changing behaviors without addressing programming is like planting seeds in rocky soil.

The roots can’t take hold.

When you rewrite your programming, you create fertile ground for new habits to grow and thrive.

 

How Programming Shapes Behavior

– *Belief:* “I’m not worthy of love.”
– *Behavior:* Avoiding intimacy, sabotaging relationships.

– *Belief:* “I’ll never succeed.”
– *Behavior:* Procrastination, fear of taking risks.

– *Belief:* “It’s not safe to be seen.”
– *Behavior:* Staying small, avoiding opportunities.

 

By addressing the beliefs driving these behaviors, you unlock the potential for lasting change.

 

Tools for Transformation

If you’re ready to rewrite your programming, here are some steps to begin your journey:

1. Work with a Trauma Therapist in San Diego
Partnering with a therapist who specializes in trauma can provide the tools and support you need to uncover and transform your programming.

At my practice, I integrate somatic therapy, EMDR, brainspotting, IFS, and neurofeedback to help clients create sustainable change.

 

2. Reflect on Your Beliefs
Take time to journal about the beliefs that might be holding you back. Ask yourself:
– Where did this belief come from?
– Is it true, or is it a story I’ve been telling myself?

3. Listen to Your Body
Your body holds clues about unresolved trauma.

Pay attention to physical sensations, such as tension or heaviness, when you think about making a change.

4. Be Patient and Compassionate
Healing is a process, not a quick fix. Celebrate small wins and treat yourself with kindness along the way.

 

The Power of Seeking Help for Sustainable Change with Somatic Therapy in San Diego

Healing doesn’t happen in isolation.

Working with a trauma therapist who understands the mind-body connection can be a game-changer.

As a San Diego trauma therapist, I specialize in helping clients address anxiety, PTSD, and the long-term effects of trauma.

My holistic approach integrates evidence-based modalities to support deep, lasting healing.

 

If you’ve struggled with behavioral changes in the past, it’s not because you’re weak or unmotivated—it’s because your programming is holding you back.

The good news is that you can rewrite those scripts.

 

 

Start Your Journey to Sustainable Change With Somatic Therapy in San Diego

This New Year, instead of focusing solely on external goals, take a deeper approach.

Uncover the programming driving your behaviors, heal the wounds holding you back, and step into the life you deserve.

If you’re ready to transform your life, I invite you to explore how trauma therapy can help.

At my practice in San Diego, I offer Somatic therapy, EMDR, Brainspotting, IFS, and Neurofeedback to support clients on their healing journey.

 

Visit my website to learn more and schedule your first session.  

You can also email shay@overcomeanxietytrauma.com

Together, we can create sustainable change that lasts far beyond January.

**Healing is possible—and it begins with you.**.  

 

Shay has contributed to National Geographic, Yahoo! Life, The Flow Space Magazine, and a soon to be published article in Parade.